Straight talking

There’s nothing more irritating for a frizzy-haired person than being told: “You’re so lucky to have curly hair.”

Curly hair is not lucky, it’s a flipping nuisance. For those not similarly encumbered, I’ll  explain that curls do not (or certainly not in my case), fall in seductive cascades down around one’s shoulders. No, curls have a mind of their own, and it’s a mind that goes off in random and unpredictable directions, upwards, outwards, anywards, twisting and spiraling with frightening determination. So the curl-owner ends up looking like somebody wearing a ball of tumbleweed on their head.

Image: Wikipedia, CCL

As a schoolgirl I tried taming my violent hair by washing it and then locking down a scarf upon it until it was dry – a 48-hour event that left it looking kinked and flat.

Subsequently a hairdresser showed me how to plaster the hair tightly round and round my own head and then quickly tie a cloth around it and blow it dry. It took hours and ended up lopsided with a large wave in the middle.

I’ve tried every cut in the book, every lotion, potion, cream and style, but nothing has succeeded in getting control of the tumbleweed curse. Don’t even mention rollers – I could never manage to put them in. Either too tight with the pins sticking into my scalp so that I had to remove them, or too loose and dangling uselessly.

And then came straighteners. Ah, at last a simple solution. Never mind burnt ears, necks and fingers; with sufficient serum, frizz control, heat protector and hair polish, the curls hung down in a satisfyingly straight manner. And so for many years I have felt at ease with my mop, finally in control knowing I can make it do pretty much what I want.

Three days ago I washed my hair before watching the Abu Dhabi F1 Grand Prix, and left it to dry naturally into its hideous tangle.

“I prefer your hair like that,” said TOH. “It’s nice and bubbly. Like champagne. When it’s straight it looks like a helmet – or like champagne with no bubbles.”

Well, thanks for telling me. Perhaps you could have spoken up sooner? 😀

So for a while at least, nature can take its course and do just whatever it likes. If it’s bubbly you want, it’s bubbly you’ll get. And no more worrying about it getting damp.

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